I can't believe 2010 is coming to an end!!!!
From January to April I was mostly in school, but went to China for ASC in March. It was close to exams and smack in the middle of the main presentation weeks. Summer holidays started after exams, and I went for Sydney at the end of May to get some training in strong winds. Went to Kiel in June for first selection trials. Back in Singapore for a rest in July and then in August, we went to Weymouth, UK for second trials. September was spent in Singapore, where I trained under Mark Plummer. I think sometime in October I went to Perth for the AG training camp. November in China. End of November I flew to Africa. Spent the early part of December in Namibia, with dad and a 4x4. Now i'm gonna have to prepare for school.
Not been in school for 8 months now and it's going to be a challenge to step back in esp since I kinda flunked my last sem in school. Looking forward to it, but kinda uncertain at the same time.
The year ended well and I'll take my lessons with me.
2011, here we go.
Seem what I'm trying to say is,
you make things, better.
No matter what the day is,
if you're here, it's better.
I know I've said this many times this year, but I'm saying it again. Why do I have to say it so many times? Haha. Anyway. Here it is.
Tmr marks the beginning of new things.
Many exciting things to look forward to. One thing I have to remember: We work for what we want. This year is a test for me and I know I'm currently doing very well. Hope to pass with flying colours.
Side track.. question: Should I go to Namibia?
It's a strange feeling I'm feeling happy deep inside me but so tired physically. Maybe it was a mistake to cycle for 5 hours today. Yawn. Waking up at 8am tmr.
rarely do you see people wear "little miss ____" shirts that actually suit them. for example, skinny girls wearing a "little miss greedy" shirt. but you know... the "little miss naughty" shirt was MADE for nastasha. she was born to wear it. i'm not sure why she loves inflicting pain on me every single time she sees me. do i have a face that says "please hurt me"? little imp. kids.
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for the past few months, i felt myself making slow progress in my drumming. the last two weeks, however, i could feel some difference in the way i play. james is so patient and i really love his lessons. having a good teacher/coach makes a whole lot of difference to a student and i really thank god that i have such a great teacher.
anyway, one difference that i felt in the way i play was my ability to control all four limbs by listening to the sound it creates. (that is different from the ability to play on a drum set using all four limbs) it's like hardwiring a sound to a movement. so when you want to hear a sound you automatically play it without having to think about it. it's easy to do with your dominant leg and both hands, but the non-dominant leg is always a bit more retarded. so i've been praticing a lot more with my super retarded left leg and i'm having a lot of fun. being able to play 4 different beats with my 4 limbs at the same time to create what i'd call 'music' (perhaps to my ears only haha) is very fulfilling.
another thing i noticed about the way i learn, when it comes to drumming, is that i learn better by listening rather than seeing. but.. am i at all ready for a level 4 ANZCA exam? i'm so screwed.
we all need some excitement in life.
And I eat her. Said I eat her. Beautiful lobster. But I don't mind.
songs about love does nothing but harm
we need more songs about grace and truth
why can't life be a bit more simple.. not that i think it's complicated. i just feel so helpless at times.
on the bright side of life, i have taken a break from school this semester and i think i really need it, whether i'll be sailing or not. at the end of this year, i'll need to craft a master plan for the next 2 years of my life. venture into something new and different and finally, hopefully, if time allows, focus on my drumming.
i need to go on exchange next year or 2012. i have to complete my 100 hour internship. and 80 hours of cip. o.m.g. sio-b-han, you better see through whatever path you choose.
i'll grunt through this year and do my best best best best best.
you're not the only sad one
Learn to shut up. It will help me. I always tell myself that, but never seem to learn at all.
Decisions decisions. What is the best decision. It's always the hardest one :)
Some days I wish I could just disconnect from everything I know. Just for a little while. Maybe I shall.
Do you really want to live forever, forever, forever.....
I'm more than halfway through the most interesting year in my life yet. (I think that of the year every year.) Life only gets more interesting doesn't it? If not it'll be so boring.
It's strange how.. one thing can so greatly affect another. I wonder how much I'll remember of my life now, 20 years down the road. I barely remember incidents or people from primary sch, secondary sch and junior college. Or even my first 2 years in uni. We live for the now, I guess.
No one gives a shit about the past, much. Or do they? I think no one really gives a shit about (on a personal level) a person's past except the person himself. I must be wrong.
It's light wind today.. maybe about 10 knots. Craig gave us the option of taking a day off or a short sail on our own. Dawn and I opted for rest! Yay. The other 470s went sailing but they probably won't be out long. Racing starts tmr.. I can't wait. I really love racing. That's one thing I learnt about myself in this few months.
This regatta marks the beginning of good things. No matter what the outcome, it will be the start of something. I am excited either way. Take things with a pinch of salt.
Smile. Life's not that bad.
HEY SOUL SISTA!!! (playing everyday at Macdonalds...)
7th day in Weymouth. Sailing has been pretty good the past few days and the weather's been very nice to us. We're announcing REST DAY for ourselves tmr so we're just gonna have a quiet relaxing day before racing starts.
Singapore's birthday is coming up in 2 days. Happy birthday in advance! erm, dear Singapore.
Currently reading my first thriller/mystery.. The girl with the dragon tattoo. So far (1/3 into the book) it's quite good!! Going back to read now. :)
Things to do the moment I touch my boat (if I go to Weymouth).
- fix gasket
- fix centreboard
- fix topping lift rope
I had a good 2 weeks break from sailing and it is great to be back on water this week. I went for an interview to join this drum crew that I've always wanted to join and I got in. It is fun, but hard work too though. Good hobby to help de-stress when needed. Hehe.
Someone told me that, people who watch a lot of TV have a higher tendency to give people the middle finger on the road. I should watch more TV!!! (Or less.)
I'm quite excited about August. Possibly Weymouth, YOG and I'll also have to decide whether I'll go to school or not next sem. Did gym today and really tired now. Working the whole day tmr. Goodnight!
remember God has a plan for you.
So I'm meeting a friend tmr at, in his words, Shitty Hall after he finishes his run at tentatively 7 plus. And tmr we will confirm.com. I need that. Just chill. out.
The days have been passing so fast. Just a while back we were in China, and now we're halfway into July. It's exciting... all the things I see ahead of me.
Been learning these drum sequences and I think I'm going to dream of 1, 1, 1, 12, 1, 1, 12, 12, 1, 1, 1, 1. . .. ... beep beep beep beep, boom boom, beep, boom, beep, boom, beep, boom, boom. dong dong dong dongdongdong dong dong dong dong dong...
I can't wait to do my first gig. Wonder when that will be.
Whatever the plan is for me, it doesn't matter. You win some you lose some, you get some you don't get some. And such is life.
just need you to be happy
Everybody's looking for a blue sky
Searching for an answer on a satellite
I know that there's got to be a blue sky out there to see
A blue sky waiting for me
Gym was very uneventful but feels good to be back in gym anyway. Ok. Dinner now.
it's sad when u're jet lagged and feeling hungry at 4.45am and can't heat up a rice dumpling properly and there's no soy sauce nor sugar at home to eat it with. cold dumpling sucks.
oh, i just ate a mushroom though. and that was good. can't believe my luck with the soy sauce and sugar though. cold dumpling without soy sauce and sugar!
i don't mind going parachuting now.
just heard the newspaper man throwing today's newspaper to my doorstep. it is really early. i think i should just stay awake for the next 14-15 hours or so and then i can sleep properly.
for now, it's ice cream and tv.
Today feels a bit worse than Jan 18, 2008, from memory.
Sometimes, in life, we have to go through very rough patches for us to understand what is the most important thing in the end. Life itself. Your dreams, goals, ambitions and everything else becomes so unimportant. Sometimes it really doesn't matter how hard you try.
For months I've been questioning my own judgment and decisions on things, but I have zero doubt I have made the right decision today.
All I need now is some rest and some breakfast soon. I don't mind a massage and some hot tea. And a chicken avocado sandwich. And a scone if possible. A slice of Sara's quiche would be nice.
Oh, and hello world, I'm back in Singapore.
After packing my luggage, I took my luggage and my turtles to the car and headed for dinner. Right after that I went to the airport, check-ed in and boarded the plane. (My turtles will be in good hands for the next 10 days. Hope to see them happy and bigger when I get back. Thanks Sam.)
13 hours later, after the best flight ever in my entire life, I arrived in the land of everything orange. Orange toilet paper, orange container warehouse guest vest. I went into the toilet at the airport and saw 2 men inside, a toilet cleaner and a man in suit. But then, it WAS the ladies. After I came out of the toilet, I realised that the man in the suit was also a toilet cleaner. Mmm...
Unpacking the containers didn't take too long! We had a total of 20 hands and 7 brains and 3 muscular bodies, and a bonus super muscular Finn sailor with us. Unpacking indoors in cool weather is just so nice. Beats packing in Singapore, sometimes in rain, sometimes in killer sunshine, always in heat. After that we said bye bye to the windsurfers and bye bye Amsterdam.
The Australian coach, who works for Singapore, was driving a French plated car, with an New South Wales trailer, with 3 Singaporeans on board, driving from Holland to Germany.
After more than 24 hours of travelling, we're here in Kiel.
fon look! i drawed my daddy. yes that's him, with chicken pops!
Font, lily a park!
a b c d e f g, a i j k ello mellow p...
tinkle.... tinkle... lil star...
I know this is long due. Now I have some time to just sit and blog.
Coming to Liz's = Coming home. I love home.
We went to the park this morning on Tara's command. That's when I realised how much I missed her.
Drove to the club from home for the first time. I've forgotten how nice it is to drive the Mitsubishi. Feels like 10pm here even though it's only 7pm now. The sun set at around 5.30pm. Eating a caramel slice that Liz made. Yummy.
Sometimes we all just need a little timeout.
Brought my turtles to the vet before I left singapore and one's not well at all. :( He/she needs her 2 injections today.. and on Sunday again. Please get well soon T1.
Tara just threw a whole shoebox full of chrysanthemum petals onto the carpet! Hahahaha.
I went to the hospital this afternoon, and saw the most beautiful newborn drinking milk. She managed to finish all her 45ml of milk for the first time since she was born. Aryana Qaisara. She may have 2 holes in her heart, dilated kidneys, an imperforate anus, and probably Down's Syndrome, but she's brave and she's beautiful.
I carried her for the first time today and she slept soundly in my arms. 
I was so excited and happy. But at the same time, I felt so helpless. I wish I could do something to help her, and make her better.
At 1 day old, she went through surgery, and there are 3 more to go if all goes well. She already got herself a bravery award!! I wish and hope she will be happy no matter what, and I love her so much so much so much. That is all I can give.
Once in a while, life goes by in a flash. The last post, I had 6 days to exams. Exams were over 2 days ago. Just finished reading My Steve by Terri Irwin. Terri's honesty was felt through her words.
Sometimes books can make you feel so small an insignificant, not in a bad way, but in a way that makes you reflect in the things you do or say, or make you think of what you can/want achieve to make a difference in some way.
I went to find this page again after I finished reading the book. It kinda stood out to me.
____________
Ever since I met him, Steve refused to let me dress or have anything to do with any of his wounds. He didn't even like to talk about his injuries. I think this was a legacy from his years alone in the bush. He had his own approach to being injured, and called it 'the goanna theory'.
"Sometimes you'll see a goanna that's been hurt," he said. "He may have been hit by a car and had a leg torn off. Maybe he's missing a chunk of his tail. Does he walk around feeling sorry for himself? No. He goes about doing his business, hunting for food, looking for mates, climbing trees and doing the best that he can."
____________
It's a good book. I liked the part where Steve told his mate, Wes, that they had a 'board meeting' to go to, and they went on a surfing trip somewhere. Steve also said, "If I could be remembered for any one thing," Steve said, "I'd like to be remembered as a good dad." I wish I knew that man. He's a legend, who seemed to have a spiritual connection with nature. Ok, enough about the book..........
Life is only this short. We need to shorten the time taken to define ourselves so that we can really get it going. Find your purpose and work towards that.
What makes you happier than hotcakes in the morning?
Laughter is contagious.
Currently reading: A Brief Tour of Human Consciousness by V.S. Ramachandran
Supposed-to-be currently reading: Stats notes/FA notes/BP notes/Marketing notes/PS notes because exam are in... 6 days.
while commuting this morning, i was thinking of my art lessons in secondary school. i remember i had to draw a chili for my art exam. i failed. and i thought i drew the nicest chili ever. art. who is to grade art anyway. ok that was rather random.
anyway hello world.
back from asian sailing championship. shanwei, guangzhou, china. was not too bad. short trip and now i'm back in sg for exams..... ROAR.
i feel addicted to strong winds now. can't wait to sail in strong wind and swells again. when when when? ever sailed in swells so big that when the boat goes down the wave, your feet are detached from the boat while on trapeze? woohoo... strong winds..
is a $2400 top end electronic drum set too much to ask for?? it's on offer!! Roland!
haven't been feeling too well since i got home, or rather, since the last day in China. need to sleep and sleep this weekend and drink lots of water. just so tired constantly. after 2 weeks of tiring training and racing and.. blah and blah and blah blah blah.
2 little things i'm miss lots now, tara and lily. when will i see them again???
who is to define good and bad anyway.
many times things get us down in life, winners get back up. everybody can be a winner.
Life is as easy as ABC.
i found out that, happiness has to be found. it doesn't just come to us. i'm going to find it. i hope you find it.
life's been ok, just that i thought the make up class for Chinese New Year was last night but it wasn't. Mmm.. Got a new handphone plan and since people have been nagging at me to get a new phone, I got one for free, with the plan.
things to look forward to now:
1) fitness test when i get well
2) getting fit and putting on weight
3) helping to finish my electric bike
4) riding my electric bike
5) dinner in 1/2 an hour and playing with carmen who is so cute
Reading the album previews of Soldier of Love makes me excited. 8th Feb.
Yesterday, I spent some time to really listen to the album We/Know/Where/The/Winter/Goes. Hadn't really listened to it properly since I got it for Christmas. And.... I love it. My fav song from the album is,
Dear God (Sincerely M.O.F) by MOF:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8wpGHGFV8Xk
Had my financial accounting test this morning and we all know how it went. Long day again today. Class in morning, sailing in afternoon and class at night. It's weird how we call days like this "long" days. I shall stop using that phrase. Long day. Does me no good but reminds me of the.. erm.. long day.
Time flies. Another week had gone by and we jumped right into Tuesday. Soon it'll be March, and soon the year is over. Soon i'll be 30.
Focus on the now. Which is class. Bye.
Letting go is a hard thing.
I think there are things to look forward to. I need to focus on those, and trust that I'll be forgiven.
Will I be forgiven?
(Will I forgive myself?)
I've decided. I need to learn more about music. Pick up more instruments and expand my limited knowledge about music. So, that's what I'm going to do. But first, I need money(and time). Who wants to donate to Bon's Music Fund?
Sade's new album. I need that. If i'm going to mix music one day, it'll be Sade with dance/hiphop beats.
I don't know why people don't like Hanson, or make fun of them because of Mmmbop. I mean, ya like what the hell is an mmmbop right? Take away all the mmmbops from the lyrics and you will see what they're trying to say. Their lyrics always have a deeper meaning to things. I love it! They're my fav indie band.
I can't wait for their new album. Excited.
April 2010. Beginning of many things!!! (eg. school hols, hanson's new album.. mm.. that's about it.)
Please read previous entry and leave a comment and thoughts.
sorry doesn't solve. but it eases.
happiness is simple, but how its triggered can be complicated.
at the crossroads, you either choose 1 or 2. you heart chooses 1, but your mind chooses 2. both leads to the unknown. so how do you choose? if you know, please leave a comment, because, i really don't and i wish i knew.
A capella, sounds good to me.
Again, I find myself doing what i'm best at. Stalking!!! in class. (Thanks to Jake Moulton) But don't worry, my selective hearing for Sebastian Tan's class is well trained. When there's a lot of laughter, don't need to listen. When he's referring to slides, listen. HR classes are more fun than ACCOUNTING, FINANCE, ECONS. ROAR!
I want the "good things" album by the The House Jacks.
thehousejacks
***
Just finished the class activity. It goes like this. Every week he'll randomly put us into groups, give us a case and we'll have to solve the HR problems, come up with an action plan within a time limit. It's quite exciting. So basically, we have a presentation every week. I think I've talked about this before, when I was attending his Human Capital Management course last sem. 4/5 of this class have taken a module under him before, so it's quite relaxed and fun. 3/4 of the class are like graduating students. SIGH. 
Dear avid readers of my not so interesting blog, how are we doing today?
As usual, i'm in class. This prof has like her back facing us and just reading off the powerpoint slides. Sigh.
I can feel the energy in my body slowly building up. It's the first time I'm feeling so much inertia though. Maybe I was away for too long. 1 and a half months in Australia. And I've never been very good at going back to school after my school holidays.
I really wanted to do a summary for 2009 but I thought it'd be rather boring as compared to my 2008 one, so I won't bother. I'll make sure there are interesting things to write on 2010 at the end of this year.
I wish Singapore had nice clean beaches with clear cool shallow waters. Grab a beach towel and some picnic food and that's my day. Days. Years. Life. Snap back to reality, oh there goes gravity.
On my way to school today, I was listening to some music. I was thinking to myself, how amazing it is that the music industry is so damn huge. I mean.. it's erm, just music. But is is MUSIC. Everyone enjoys some kind of music. Music makes the world go round.
You're right. We all need some kind of motivation. Both intrinsic and extrinsic. I just need to find that motivation. I think goals and motivation are 2 different things, although they kinda run side by side. We need to find our own motivation.
When I have the time and money, I'm going paragliding.
i was gonna spend the 31st writing my summary of 2009 but it didn't happen. instead, i spent the 31st doing nothing. didn't countdown or anything. school's starting in a few days. life's supposed to go back to normal in a few days.
normal isn't always good you know? normal can be, not good. haha.
COME ON BUN. it's 2010.
ok, things to look forward to?
NEXT
i went to wala-wala last night to watch EIC live. watching joe play the drums takes my mind off everything. he's damn good. i never used to appreciate the bassist in bands, but yesterday changed everything. the EIC bassist is DAMN GOOD too. wonder when i'll get to watch them again. with school starting and training resuming soon, i'm gonna be busy.
yaya is home today and it's a nice feeling.
Saw this on youtube while enjoying one of my erm.. ear candies. Now I can't listen to the song properly anymore!!