testify to love

not everyone can be who they really want to be.

i'm officially on holiday. 1 or 2 more days in melbourne and we're driving to adelaide. sail melbourne ended very interestingly and there are so many thoughts in my mind i don't know where to start. so i decided not to.

i feel like my body just totally shut down after the regatta. which is a good thing. it was so pumped up for like a month and finally my brain can tell my body i can rest and i'm just so tired. i just want to sleep.

school starts right after we get home. and it starts all over again.

First time blogging from my itouch. At the club now. Just fixed gasket and ready to race. Eating my pasta with capsicum corn broccoli carrot ham beef and tomatoes.

Everyday before we launch, we play some ball thing to warm up and it's quite fun. Only it emphasizes my clumsiness and inability to kick balls. The rest should be arriving soon. Race at 3 so we launch around 2. See ya!

I've been having dreams where, life and death seem so trivial. It's almost scary.

this is what Brett, Dawn and I had for dinner.

left over lamb
left over chicken
soggy rice
boiled sweet corn
sliced tomatoes
sliced avocado

liz wasn't around so we just took stuff out of the fridge and "made dinner". it wasn't too bad, considering we went for a bbq thingy at double bay yacht club after sailing before the hour long drive home.

i'm tired now. been sailing everyday since the day we arrived in Sydney. tmr we're finally taking a rest. last night it was so hot and stuffy, i had a terrible terrible nightmare. woke up 3-4 times in the night cos it was so hot. i was already sleeping on the couch in front of the fan, with no blanket.

tmr is the day before my biz law exam and i'm going to. erm. maybe go up to westfield and buy something nice for liz. and the rest of the day, study and just rest my muscles. DID I SAY MUSCLES?

Ok. Ta.

Was at the club and sleeping on the couch before sailing. Dreamt that I was on the train although I was sure I was sleeping on the couch. The train started to move very violently and I wanted to wake up but I couldn't. Trapped in the train, while sleeping on the couch. Not a nice feeling.

I just found out that the tallest girl in the world is 6ft10. From thailand.

The waves out the heads of Sydney Harbor are huge. One knocked my entire body off the trapeze and into the boat right beside the rudder, and it ate up our boat. Boat was filled with water up to jib cars or something. Auto bailers and back flaps are the best things on earth.

Need sleep. It's almost 8 Singapore time. It's 11pm here. Need to start studying for my exams.. in a couple of days.....

i don't want to forget you.
i won't forget you.
i will love you.
even if i forget you,
we will meet again.

and they met again.
watch it.

the problem with words, is that, they can't be taken back.

my brain only has this much space. so i've decided to just do what makes me happy.

the decisions we make today, affect our tomorrow.

why do i not want it in my memory? because when something's in my memory, it means it has ended.


it doesn't take a scientist to know i've been down, for a while now. i think if every person can be that little bit more understanding, everyone will be happier. stop adding unnecessary stress to ourselves and focus on the good. is it that hard?

do you think everyone has a certain amount of energy to be nice, and when it's used up, you just can't be nice anymore?

I've got no energy for any of this.

My friggin index finger is not friggin healing. Who can understand this friggin pain.

Singapore is too full of *(&@#&%^&$*&*#!!(*$!!! drivers. It kills to signal. Tailgaters. Horn cos you lose patience. Accelerate so that that car can't come into your lane. This world sucks.

There will be justice.

I'm so tired. Where am I gonna find time to study for my exam next Friday? Just finished the next round of editing for my MPW report. Gonna sleep now and get ready for another long day tmr, to end it with project meeting again.

The only real thing in my life right now. Toots.

if something goes wrong, please don't go around blaming every other person but yourself.

craig's ill. wonder what's wrong with him and whether he's better now.

failed stats exam.

tmr's wed, which means no school. finally. after 2 long days. still in class now though.

mmm.

i won't let the monster engulf my entirety. wow. i have feelings.

enough of that crap. 2 more weeks of school and i'm going to sydney. feels unreal. the school term's coming to an end just like this. an exam in 12 days. 2 exams in sydney. one exam in april next year. first time i'll be taking an exam overseas.

the school intranet has been really slow most nights and i'm starting to get annoyed. my turtles are making me feel better now, by sitting on the log and staring at me and my laptop. i wish they ate ants.. then i can just feed them ants. plenty of ants around.

every once in a while, i need a bit of time on my own, to treat myself to a little something. so i walked over to step-by-step for foot massage. i'm convinced i can take pain better than before. i'm gonna sleep well tonight for sure. looking forward to that.

i've been wanting to do this for a while now, and tonight i'm finally bothered enough to do it. i have always loved taking photos of the sky with the sea, and just wanted to share some here.
1&2) I was cycling home from NSC one evening and I saw the most haunting and beautiful sky ever in my entire time in Singapore.
3) It was not hard to wake up for my morning walks with Manyi at Lake Garda because of this.
4) Top of the Gulf 2008. Pattaya.
5) Same sailing club in Pattaya, SEA Games 2007.
6&7) Melbourne 2007 year end. It was a very interesting trip for me because.. being the oldest one amongst the laser sailors, most of the time, it was just me and my camera.

"sorry ah, i'm not the not-conscious-about-the-audience type. i'm the conscious-about-the-audience type. so can you all please listen?" My biz law prof is just so funny.



evidently, i feel a lot more relaxed after my stats exam last night.

Can't wait for this week to be over. (I predict I'll be saying the same thing next week.) Stats exam tmr night. HCM report and presentation due Monday, which means Thursday, Friday and Saturday project meeting, since we haven't started at all. SMART. Sunday morning Stats project meeting. Friday there's also MPW project meeting.

Guys, don't complain to me you're busy. We all are. Whenever I get busy, I tend to rant on my blog about all the projects and reports I have to do. I should really stop that. For today, just let me be.

你已经远远离开 我也会慢慢走开
为什么我连分开都迁就着你
我真的没有天份 安静的没这么快
我会学着放弃你 是因为我太爱你

安静 - 周杰伦

Don't really know why I played Jay Chou's songs while studying stats today, cos vivaldi is usually my first choice when it comes to studying.

Something interesting about my mum: She loves to serve food & drinks on trays. Even if it's just 1 cup.

Celebrated Audrey and Samuel's birthday tonight. Always nice to hang out with the 6 of them. Sometimes I wish I didn't have to grow up.



Sometimes, all I need is 5 minutes. Anymore is bonus.

Sunday mornings aren't meant to be spent this way: in school for project meeting. It helps that my groupmates are quite nice to work with.

We just arranged next week's meeting, and it's on Sunday morning again.

It's amazing how difficult it is to write a happy tune. Why is it so hard for slow songs to sound happy? Why must "happy songs" always have either damn high bpm or staccato all the way? Even those love songs that have happy meanings with lyrics that goes like "i'm so glad i founnndddd youuuuuu" or "cherrissshhh this llooooveee weee have.." seldom have melodies that sound happy. Slow songs can sound inspiring or peaceful at most, not happy. Maybe peace is a form of happiness.

You see, I wanna write a slow but happy song. But they always turn out sounding melancholic with the slightest injection of excitement here and there. No sign of happiness nor joy in my songs. Maybe I should increase the range in my melodies.

Just felt like doing this.

今天我很开心。虽然累，可是这是值得的。

Anyway, all I wrote above is.. Today I'm happy. Although i'm feeling tired, but it is worth it.

Drums was great. First time I played the entire song from beginning to end, at 150bpm. My test piece "Take It All". Next week is the test. Mmm... Wednesday night there's stats exam and thursday is drums test. Don't ask me to prioritize, because then, i'll be focusing on my drums. Just tell me to study stats.

My turtles are so active tonight it's almost weird. They're swimming around, climbing onto the log and jumping back down for another swim.. and climbing back up again. (:

Can't wait to finish the last few weeks of school. Then left with exams. For now, 2 more projects, excluding MPW because we're only left with the report. Got some feedback from the prof regarding our MPW presentation, and he said we did quite well. Hee.

8 days in a row. And i'm not tired of this. I won't get tired of this. I just wish I had more hours in a day. Especially thursdays. Time stops within me, but not around me..if that even make sense at all. I don't need to make sense. My point is, sometimes i wish time could stop. Ok, I should sleep. My lack of sleep is driving me nuts.

晚安。Goodnight.

It's very hard when someone tells you something and says, "This stays between us..", and you're not really given a choice whether you want to know about it or not, before he/she says that something. Honestly, it was something I didn't, and don't want to know.

Life will be good, as long as you have breakfast every morning. I love breakfast. Breakfast is good.

I have a pop quiz in 2 minutes. Good game siobhan.

1) My friend said, "I see your strength and my strength.. like no strength leh. Eh? What am I talking about ah?" The first time I met her, I thought to myself, "Manyi". She looks like Manyi(at least that's what I think), talks like Manyi and her actions are like Manyi. I can't get over it.

2) Last Thursday I had some time between Business Law class and drum lesson. I went to the Singapore Art Museum with the ggs. I don't know how to appreciate some of the art forms. But I quite like Wu Guan Zhong's paintings. He was born in 1919. He's damn old!!

3) Happiness is a state of mind. Then again, so are all our other emotions. It's a choice.

4) Not all questions are meant to be answered. Some questions are asked to make you think.

5) Last Thursday, James figured out the drum tab for Please Don't Stop The Rain, and we played along with the song. Love drum lessons. I'm gonna bring in a song each week from now on.

6) I've got $25 Isetan voucher. How should I use it? :D

7) Today is a busy day. I choose to be happy.

First attempt to mug biz law: EPIC FAIL

If I did any studying at all, it was sang to me. Thanks to Dawn. Because of her, I always end up not studying and probably end up knowing more than I could have known if I actually studied. Don't ask me how it happens. It happens. Maybe when I'm with her, her brain cells diffuse into my brain.

Today I was meant to study biz law, but all i know is how tiring gym was and how achy i'm feeling now. Walked to bus stop with Shufen and took 36 home with her. Always enjoy goreship sessions with shu... :D

Let me give you an understatement: My day started well.

I can't wait for tmr.

We can pray for sunny weather
But that won't stop the rain

Love James Morrison.

Biz Law exam in 2 days. Drum lesson in 2 days right after exam. Outing in 2 days. Lots to look forward to. :D

HCM project needs to pick up pace. Only 2 out of 6 members turned up for 1st project meeting. JOKE. 15 page report, HELLO can you just appear on your own?

Just got assigned Stats project. 3 Vietnamese and SL and me. Couple of weeks to come up with the report..... there's never enough time. This prof seems to like fluff, which is what year 1s are still happy, willing to do while they're still innocent and have no clue what uni should really be all about yet. Fluff feels very.. fluffy... erm. waste time. Oh well. Who ask me year 1 never finish stats.

MPW project, as usual slow and irritating.. plus presentation next week. Then final report in a couple of weeks. Digress abit. I think Singaporeans in general (including me of cos) really need to brush up the way they articulate and pronounce their words. There was this group presenting on ethnic differences affecting job performance blahblah. One member kept saying antique. Another kept saying ethic. And the last one kept saying ethernic. SIGH.

So glad i'm done with Biz Law presentation. Now I need to mug. For the first time in uni. I'm going to mug.

Speaking of mugging or rather not mugging. Had a stats quiz today.. which involved a lot of calculation. I did not calculate anything, and did not touch my calculator at all because I had no clue what formulae to use. So I chose what I thought were the most logical answers and got 70%. So for the first time in my life, I felt smart. (Too bad next week's exam is not MCQ. DAMN) I know I was just lucky.

xoxo

I've totally forgotten how important drums was to me, until yesterday. I just find so much joy playing the different beats and fills, playing alongside with James who's always doing cool tricks and stuff, thinking about nothing at all. James is like the coolest teacher around, and I can talk to him about anything. I seriously felt so much less stressed the moment lesson ended. Excited... need to practice. BUT. Next week is going to be such a hectic week.

I haven't even started revision for my exams on Monday, Tuesday and Thursday because I have a report to hand up this afternoon that's not even 50% done, and report on Monday which is... close to finished.

I am happy. I won't complain about anything.

OK. Got to go do report.

oh, and i can't believe i sat through such a long meeting today. it was fun though.


i don't know how some people can cut a line so damn clear between personal and work stuff.


i don't know why i cried. i wasn't happy, i wasn't sad. i was just overwhelmed.

Jem did go to the auditions in the end! Hope he gets in.. Shel was one of the judges! If only i.. mm.

The phrase "in a way others don't" has been stuck in my head since this morning. It helps. Very clever thinking.

I'm just taking a short break from writing some report. I volunteered to do 2 parts, while everyone else does 1 because I felt bad that I was away for 2 weeks. Very smart. I've spent a long time on the first part, and the second part is the longer one. See now like that.. how.

i need to sail. even though my finger feels quite crappy. it's better today though. which is a good sign.

the past few days were..., let's see... amazingly, considering all this stuff going through my mind, and all the uncertainty and tiredness, i was happy.

liz and tara are leaving today. i didn't get to spend much time with them at all because of school and training. we didn't go to the zoo either. nevermind, i did have a good couple of days in UK with them. hopefully i'll get to see them in sydney this year end. will miss them.

i don't know when i went off track. it's time to get back on. or do i want to.


mid term break has just started but i'm piled with work, plus 2 mid term exams after the break. mmm.

i feel pressured. by you. please just let me be, once in a while.

But sometimes it seems completely forbidden.
To discover those feelings that we kept so well hidden.
Where there's no competition.
And you render my condition.
Though improbable it's not impossible.
For a love that could be unstoppable.

But wait.
A fine line's between fate and destiny.
Do you believe in the things that were just meant to be?
When you tell me the stories of your quest for me.
Picturesque is the picture you paint effortlessly.

And as our energies mix and begin to multiply.
Everyday situations, they start to simplify.
So things will never be the same between you and I.
We intertwined our life forces and now we're unified.

based on that argument, i must say, i love myself a lot.

it seems like i can't keep track of the time and date anymore. everything's like a blur. things happening and happening. and i'm just flowing along. i'm tired.

mm, when i cycled home just now, all the residents were like in the carpark. i was wondering why. then i bumped into my little neighbour and his grandma, and they told me there was an earthquake. one of those mini ones that we get once in a while here in this premise. mm.. tsunami in samoa.

anyway the topic quickly shifted to the little packet of ice sitting on my left index finger. i happily injured it while at gym this evening.. just when i was thinking, great, my middle finger's sort of recovered and i can go for drum lessons tmr. ROAR..........
i'd say to you, she didn't throw it away.

embarrass. embarrassing. embarrassment. what a weird word. say it a few times and stare at it for a while. wait, maybe i'm the weird one.

sam wise said something very wise last night: jealousy is more self love than love. man! what a good quote. and so true. oh since i'm on quotes, let me share 2 more quotes that my sister shared with me a few weeks back.

1) "sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful blessing." i think i can agree to that. not sure. i'll see. sometimes you don't really know until you've stepped into the future.
2) "in despair, in the fear of tomorrow, when you believe you have reached the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on."

i was watching this show called The Choir with the Rickards one night. latest music idol: Gareth Malone. you know, i've always had this musical thing at the back of my head. i love music. i want to continue playing that trumpet, and the french horn, singing in a choir, playing in a band. i love performing. but i can't find the time and i won't complain that ms tng forced me to quit the band and put me in sailing. (although sailing was also the reason why i stopped piano lessons and got kicked out of MEP.)

i love how 100s of instruments can come together and produce something so beautiful. i love how sopranos can't do without tenors, altos and basses. and i love being a part of all that. i think some of you can understand how i feel.

james pang and gareth malone have 2 things in common: they love music, and they have a passion to pass on their musical knowledge. and that is what inspires me.

where you won't really understand much of what i'm saying. once in a while i just need to say stuff that people don't understand.

should we believe.. or rather, believe in a one-sided story? maybe i shouldn't use one-sided. i should say, imbalanced.

i feel like eating a fortune cookie, for the sake of reading one of those funny fortune cookie notes.

if you listen to the harmonization in a song more than its melody, what does that say about you? i found out on the way back from uk, that that's what i always do when i listen to songs. another thing i found out about myself is, i have an inclination towards haunting songs. mm.. not really that. evocative? perhaps?

i am starting to see this picture now. day by day. it's like a jigsaw puzzle slowly piecing itself together. slowly. and i'm answering those questions from 8, 7 and 3 years ago. how cool is that? not really cool.

back to school tmr. just one week buddy. breathe now.

i like taking photos because i can capture moments in time and keep them frozen.





we can't turn back time. life is too short for us to wish we could.

i'm home. and jet lagged. but i think i should be able to sleep tonight since i didn't sleep much last night.

no one knows the truth, not even you.

this morning, my heart felt heavy for many reasons. going back home is like the last thing i want to do now. but i am. going home.

to face many things. and there's a crazily long and hard journey ahead of me. haha, sit in the bus for 2 hours and sit in the plane for 12 hours.

what do i know. how do i know what's hard.



leaving this place, is like waking up from a good dream.

finally.

she melts my heart.

Right now, I'm looking out the window and I can see birds flying in their V formation.

Hello world, I'm at the Rickards. Very nice people. I always enjoy a few days of, doing.. mmm... something totally different from what I usually do. So I experienced a few new things today.

A day at the Rickards.

I woke up, had breakfast, and had a little tour around the farm with Brett, Liz and Tara. I can only remember pumpkins, onions, broccoli, strawberries, raspberries, cabbage, carrots, corn, tomatoes, peppers, chillies... many different flowers.. apple trees, pear trees.. There's a whole lot more.

Went to the cottage a hundred meters away where Liz's brother lives, and looked around a bit. Then William, Tara's cousin, came with us to the car boot sale. Sunday car boot sale. And the highlight for the kids was the ice cream before we left. Love it when they eat ice cream and seriously get it all over their mouths and noses.

William is 2 and a half, but as tall as, and heavier than Tara who's 3 and a bit. We came back, had lunch and lazed around a bit. Played hide-siobhan-under-the-blanket-and-cushions-and-pretend-you-don't-know-she's-there-then-seek-her-somewhere-else with Tara.

We walked to the church where Brett and Liz got married, and then to the canal and saw 2 canal boats. Cool things. Then we rode in the big lorry with Grandpa Walter to deliver some stuff to a garden center. Brett says these lorries are hard things to drive. On the way back, they stopped somewhere to do a job.. so Tara and I were in the truck. And we had a 15 minute conversation. The longest conversation we've had.

Just had a bath and dinner. What a simple life. Just when I needed it.

The hand.

On the last day in Weymouth, I injured my hand, finger.. I dunno. Something. I was trying to pull the powerboat up the trailer, but something happened and the handle spun around with such force it hit my hand and fingers somehow. The next thing I knew, I was sitting on the ground and staring at my hand. My middle finger looked like it was broken cos it was in a weird angle. I tried to find the medics but couldn't. So got some ice and iced it. Only after a while did I start feeling the pain. Oh my goodness.

Thought the finger gg.. but i think it was just bruised cos now it doesn't feel too bad, just can't bend it too well. Yesterday, my palm turned purplelish. I think it'll be ok in 2-3 days.

I'm coming home soon.

it's me and Brett's turn on the stove again tonight. gonna go simple tonight. easy to prepare.

no racing today. the wind was "too strong". yesterday was stronger i think. but today the wind was from a different direction. harder to get out of the harbor maybe. not sure.

i've got basil breathe now. eeewwwwwww... nice.... just had a bowl of cereal (my fav dorset brand, expensive in singapore) and a pesto sandwich with cheese and ham, again. everyday. like 3-4 a day. but i'm not tired of it yet. just alternate between sun dried tomato pesto and original pesto.

rushed out of the house this morning when pete came by at 9.30am(he was supposed to pick us at 10.45am) and said, "starts moved forward girls, gtg." 10 minutes later, when we hopped into the car, pete said, "postponed again.." reached the club, waited waited waited and 4 hours later, ap over a came up.

just saw this sms on my phone. (finally charged it after 4 days).

loke: Bun wa lao pull harder can not? Haha. Anyway all e best 4 e rest o e races.

firstly, what kind of language is that. secondly, Ian finally typed a "haha" in an sms. thirdly, I didn't know my friends kept up with my races. (ok maybe its just this one friend.) the message doesn't say much, but it's so sweet. it's the first time an (ex) classmate smsed me when i'm overseas racing.

going to shower and run to Brett's to prepare dinner.

Phew. Finally I get a chance to sit down and use the computer, with internet. Yay. Craig went to the guest house next door to ask them if we could kop their internet for a few days. Free wireless from where Craig, Dawn and I are staying. (3 if us in one flat. Pete, Brett and boys in the "cottage".) I believe we got the better deal.. chances of collision in this flat is so much less.

Weird layout though. Dawn and I stay in a room in the basement where the kitchen, toilet and bathroom are as well. Ground floor is just Craig's room and a living room(where i am currently).((better internet connection)).

This is one of the most ancient accomodations I've ever stayed in. We have to put coins in for electricity and water heating. There's only a bathtub. No shower. I gave up trying to use that short tube with a shower head while kneeling down in the bath tub. So I took a bath. I don't really know how to take baths in bathtubs. Ok. Nvm.

Starting to feel a bit tired now. Good nights peeps.

I finally told someone. It's like letting air out of a bursting tire.

I was gonna say it was like letting gas out.. but that sounded too much like farting. Because I don't really want to make this feeling I'm feeling now sound like farting. It's better than farting. Ok. I'm just kidding. Seriously.


Masquerade!
Leering satyrs,
peering eyes.
Masquerade!
Run and hide -
but a face will
still pursue you.
-Masquerade, Phantom of the Opera

Solving riddles make people feel smart, no matter how easy the riddles are.

Time flies. And i'll be leaving home for the airport in about 50 hours. Something tells me I'm gonna be in a mad rush as usual. Runs in the family. Can't help it. ( ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ) Ok, I shall start packing early.

Many people tend to assume things. But I can understand why. People assume in order to prevent possible negativity, I think. Sometimes assumptions make life simpler. But as they all say, assuming makes an ass out of u and me. It's true too.

HCM class was quite fun today. Did an in-class individual assignment under a time contraint. And every few minutes, the prof changes the scenario or adds new variables to the situation. Which made things harder, but more fun. Who ever is able to think quickest and adapt to the changes wins. Just like sailing.

I must say I was disappointed with the apple I bought during break. It was not fresh. The guava was better. Dinner time

I don't really know what to make of today. But it's coming to an end.

Skyped with Brett, Liz and Tara. Grandma Rosemary made an appearance too. I miss them. Can't wait to see Tara(not virtually)!! I'm gonna see them soon!!! The best part is, they're coming to Singapore before heading back down to Australia.

To all who are wondering what's become of me after the cycling test, I'M ALIVE!
You are the worst thing to think of while doing the bike test.

This photo is awesome. Is it me, or do the waves look a bit like faces?

You know what's the worst song to listen to right now? Mel C's Never Be The Same Again, which happens to be one of my all time favorites. Yeah I'm emo-ing. Let me be for a little while. Haha.

I might be going to UK on Wednesday night. Looking forward to that. And if I'm going, I'll be going to Liz's place after the regatta to stay for a couple of days. Brett was warning me (just so I won't be too shocked when I get there) that it's a very backwards place. I think I'll handle it fine. Tara said she's gonna bring me berry picking.

That reminds me. The other day, Dr Cormac was gonna take some blood from my arm for a blood test right after I told him about berry picking. I was rather fidgety because I don't like blood tests. Then he said, "Just imagine you're picking berries in a farm.. you're picking berries..... you're picking berries.." He's so funny.

There are thoughts in my head that are sending chills up my spine. Not exactly creepy thoughts. Just random snippets of memory that sit in my 1gb hard disk.

I think memories are rather scary. Sometimes, I'm kinda thankful that I don't have a fantastic memory. It makes it easier to forget some things. (What if I don't want to forget.)


I've got a fitness test in the afternoon tmr. Hope it goes well.

1 down, 3 to go. Had my Business Law presentation today. I think my presentation skills are getting better and better after each presentation. 3rd week of school. 12 to go. Woohoo.

When you feel your heart sink, the first thing you will think of is "I just felt my heart sink."

Someone said to me today, "You're the last person who should feel sorry for ___. The last person." I don't know why but tears welled up in my eyes.


On a happier note, nothing bad happened today.



Go Brett!! Kick some ass...!!

For the first time, I cried about it all.

I ate my 2 cookies before my six-inch sub. The significance of that? I don't get to enjoy 2 cookies after my sandwich. Like having dessert before dinner. I have a 10 min break, so i'm eating my sandwich now.

Remind me not to choose a class at SESS in the morning and the next at LKCSOB right after. You only get like 15 min between both classes. 5min spent listening to prof say "sorry, and just need a couple more minutes..", 5min spent waiting for the lift which is super crowded because everyone ends lessons at the same time, 5min to run to the other end of the school. This usually means there isn't much time or no time at all to buy lunch.

But I decided to buy lunch today because I didn't want to skip lunch again. (And yesterday I had 2 lunches. Weight gain...... Yuuummmmmmyy.....) So I ran down the staircase that was meant for fire escape, and queued up for my usual Turkey Breast Subway Meal. A drink, a sub and 2 cookies.

Ok, my 10 min break is over. Ta.

I thought to myself in class today.. I can make friends because people want to know how to pronounce my name. People come up to me and say.. "Hello. Hey, sorry ah, how do I pronounce your name?"

"Haha, it's ok. I get that a lot. I'm she-vonne."

And they never talk to me ever again. Two possible reasons.
1) They've forgotten how to pronounce my name and is embarrassed to ask again.
2) They were really just curious to know how to pronounce my name and had no intention of becoming my friend.

Why did I say I can make friends because people want to know how to pronounce my name at the start of this blog entry? I've forgotten.

I just saw this blog entry that my sister's friend posted. Interesting.

http://kev.deadsquid.com/?p=5


Just to correct the title of my blog, Jane is actually one form of the name Siobhan. Some trivia for you, Siobhan means "God is gracious".


At the end of the day, no one really calls me "she-vonne" anyway. It don't matter. I can't think of a person who does! Do you?

What's the point of asking a question when you are expecting or willing to accept only one answer? The answer that you think is right or you want to hear.

I finally fell ill. Caught a cold. Nevermind. Better now than in September. I was just thinking to myself, "I haven't fallen (seriously) sick in quite a few months now..." Never think those thoughts to yourself. The moment you think it, you're gonna get it. I like to think that it will do my immune system some good.

Talked on the phone with Lew for a while and it made me feel peaceful. (Just when I needed it.) I don't know why. It just did.

You know I always tell myself it's ok to be different. I want to be different. But sometimes I don't dare.

Back in school. What an intense morning. I tried to finish my homework last night but I just couldn't think anymore. So I decided to wake up in the morning to complete it. I did, but then I couldn't find my diary and the printer was not working. Blah blah blah, was running late and cycled like a mad dog to school and didn't have time to get any food. Forgot my water bottle which sucks too. Nevermind. Get Pocari Sweat at gym. I'm so thirsty now and the guy beside me is drinking coke and my stomach is growling.

My Cameron Highlands and Lake Kenyir trip was so fun. It's such a small world. I was just thinking to myself that day that this uncle on the trip, Uncle Freddy, walks, talks and looks like Uncle Tony. And that night, I found out that Uncle Freddy is Uncle Tony's younger brother!! Haha. They are seriously alike.

The weather at Cameron Highlands was nice and cooling. Lake Kenyir, the biggest man-made lake in Malaysia, was pretty. The company was great and I had fun.

Break time, I need to get lunch now. Lots of work tonight. ROAR.


If you ask me if it's wrong, I can't answer you.

I was cycling home and this random person started chatting with me. I enjoyed the conversation. Thank you random person. Funny how sometimes you can converse with strangers and really enjoy it. I miss my cycle-home-from-gym-together company, aka Sara. She'll be back in gym on Friday I assume.

NEWSFLASH!
I felt like drinking bubble tea at 9 plus tonight, and Sengleong went to Parkway to buy for me!! I feel loved. Pigs are flying tonight. Can you see them in the sky?

Human Capital Management(HCM) class was quite interesting, and the prof is witty and funny. He speaks well too. Very seldom can I survive 3 hours in class without the Internet. An assignment each week though, on top of the big project stuff. A lot of readings as well. At least the contents interest me. Oh that reminds me, I need to buy the textbook.

Tmr I've got Statistics 101 and Management of People at Work(MPW). I'm looking forward to school, and looking forward to after school as well.

In conclusion, first day at school went well, and I'm looking forward to an enjoyable(but tiring for sure) semester.

Conversation in the boat park.

Dillon: You guys training alone again? No coach?
Me: Yup.
Dillon: How come Jovina never train?
Me: She's in Hungary for race.
Dillon: How come you never go?
Me: It's a youth event.
Dillon: Huh? Jovina still youth meh.
Me: Yup.
Dillon: But she looks so much older than you two!!

Mmm... Haha. I don't really know whether to think that as a compliment or not. On this same day, someone thought I got engaged. Ok, I'd rather people think I'm young than old. No, I'm not engaged.

Sailing today was more effective than normal. Amazing how much you can learn and change in a short few hours. Thank you.

Class starts in exactly 12 hours from now. God bless my soul.

A conversation I heard in an elevator today.
Pilot: Flying in or flying out?
Air steward: I just flew in from Zurich.
Pilot: Are you serious?
Air steward: Yes sir, I was in First Class. You don't remember me?
Pilot: Sorry I don't...
Air steward: It's ok.

1 more day till school starts. Mentally, not prepared. I doubt I'll meet anyone I know in Monday's class. I don't know anyone else taking an OBHR major like me. Everyone's in Finance or Marketing. Mmm..

See what CC's burnt skin looks like now.

She looks better with long hair. Not that it'll make a difference to the music she makes. Vienna Teng.

I wonder when Hanson's gonna release their next album.

Little angel you got to learn to fly
Get up and earn your wings tonight
Little angel just look in my eyes
Get up and earn your wings tonight
-Broken Angel, Hanson


Discovered Dent May & His Magnificent Ukulele on Daytrotter. Daytrotter is seriously the best website. Have Pete to thank.

www.daytrotter.com

I can't really decide if it's a good day or bad day or just an ok day. One of those days where you get a bit of everything. I won't complain.

We sailed this afternoon when the wind was strongest. Did a variety of stuff and just enjoyed my time out there.

Latest ear candy is the album Veneer by Jose Gonzalez. I didn't know he sang Heartbeats. One of my favs. The Knife version is nicer to listen to while staring at the moon and stars. Man, I miss my lying down on the deck of the boat, listening to music and looking up into the clear sky. The moon is so bright it almost looks like the sun.

I'm really really sleepy. But I haven't done what I wanted to do the whole day.

Contrary to popular belief, I am actually capable of taking public transport. Bus AND MRT. And to make myself not sound so much like a spoilt brat, I need to inform you that I cycle around to places a lot.

I can't believe the holidays are coming to an end. I've already gotten used to this lifestyle, which is not much of a lifestyle at all. So, I think school will do me some good. It's just 14 weeks of my life at a time, and hopefully less this semester.

A good way to motivate me through my 14 weeks, is to tell myself, it's more like 14 weeks of semi-hard fitness training. Cycle to school, sit for 3-6 hours, cycle to gym/home/sailing/drums. Other than that, plenty of project meetings and study(ahem), sailing and gym.

For those who want to know, I do learn a lot in school, and it's not as bad as I make it sound. I secretly enjoy school. You know how sometimes, when you get it all going, it's not that bad.

I booked a studio for drum practice today. Good way to kill some time as well but my right knee hurts now, banging on the bass drum too much.

I've decided to wash the car later.

-------

I've washed the car already. Sparkling clean. I also went for a run before I washed the car, to a bench by the sea where I sat with a friend one night and chatted, enjoyed the breeze and the night. The weather is quite good tonight and I surprisingly enjoyed the run, because I usually don't like to run.

Meet my new friend Hobo. Mojo's a bit shy.. Doesn't want to come out to play.

No not really.

More often than not, I find myself defending people I don't need to or shouldn't defend. It's silly especially when I put myself in a disadvantaged position by defending them. But then again, it's all easily justifiable when you love someone.

Today's training session was, unexpectedly good. It's not that I expect my sessions to be bad, but this was better than good. Which is. Great. The wind just came when it wanted to. One minute it was flat and quiet, the next minute it was blowing 10-12 knots.

Latest news, Sam, Fana, Trina and Audrey bought be 2 baby turtles for my birthday. We had a mini belated birthday celebration at the old lighthouse along East Coast Park. They now live in a nice little tank with coarse sand and glow in the dark pebbles. A small log and some fake grass. Thank you guys. I named my turtles Hobo and Mojo. Don't really have a reason why I named them that, but I like it.. (Beats Homo and Mofo.)

I woke up with the worst sore throat + headache combo this morning. Had to drink water and go back to sleep and 2 extra hours made all the difference in the world.

It's creepy my dreams have been coming true. 3 times already in 2 weeks. Please please please, dream of myself marrying a rich handsome guy!!!... haha. (Or at least make the current guy handsome.. and rich...)

I think I've got funny taste when it comes to music. I think I am ok with pretty much anything except metal and screaming music(aerosmith's ok). But most people don't appreciate the music that I prefer. It's either the band's too gay, or the music's just too weird.

Anyhow, music's music. Whatever is music to your ears.


Have you ever waited for something with anticipation, only to be disappointed because it's not what you expected?

Enough emo-ness. I think I'm feeling sleepy, hence the emo-ness. I need sleep.

Sometimes you click with people straight away. (Sometimes it's the complete opposite.) Today was pretty cool. Lew asked me out. I was thinking to myself, "We've met once at the gym, had a short conversation, I don't really know her.....we do have a common interest.." and I said OK, sure, why not.

It's about time I met new people anyway. Everyone knows I have no friends. Not many anyway. All my friends are either sailors, sailing-related people, my mum's primary school tuition kids, or classmates, or babies. Raise your hand if you do not fall into any of those categories.

Look. I hang out with primary school kids and toddlers, and bring them swimming or to the beach. That's my idea of hanging out. TODAY, however, I went out with Lew and chilled out. How's that for a change.

Just talked and laughed and talked and laughed. It was a good distraction. I need it.

I was exaggerating when I said I have no friends. I take that back. I have wonderful friends. You, you and you. More than I can ask for.

I should do some planning for this month. Squeeze in more training time, even after school resumes. I need it if I want to go.



I used to prefer the acoustic version of Penny and Me more than the original. But now, I like the original version better. It has more energy. It's how it should be really. It might be because ever since I took up drums, the first thing I notice about a song is it's drum beats. Or maybe it's how I interpret the song differently from before.

I think drums give a song it's... how should I put it. Its core. Its soul. Most people don't think much of drums. The drummer is always in the background. Drums is just.. background music. But no. It's not.

Even in acoustic music, the drum beats of a song are just replaced by a stronger strum or tap of a guitar, a hit on the tambourine. It's the same thing. What would the world be like if there were no drums? I can't imagine.


Cigars in the summertime under the sky by the light,
I can feel her read my mind,
I can see it in her eyes,
Under the moon as it plays,
Like music every line,
There's a rug with bleeding dye under the fan in the room,
Where the passion's burning high,
By the chair with the leopard skin under the light,
It's always Penny and me tonight.
-Penny and Me, Hanson

A couple of hugs.
A few kisses.
A mini frenzy at my place.
A surprise.
A home-baked bitter chocolate cake.
A packet of muesli.
A bit of cream on my face.
A dunk.
An audio cd.
A visual cd.
A bag.
A dinner.
A win.
A foot massage.
A few handshakes.
Lots of smiles.
Lots of laughter.
Lots of fun.
Lots of love.


More than I need, more than I can ask for.

Ok, I am 22.

It's crazy when you really really don't want someone to do something, but at the same time really really really want him/her to do that something. I think my head is just bonkers. I've been weird lately.

Wait, I am weird.

Didn't manage to get tickets to The Complete Works of William Shakespeare because it's totally sold out!!!!, but nevermind. Received an email from Lisa, which made my day.

I miss my two fav kids from Sydney terribly. Come to Singapore... come to Singapore... come... come... come now.........

Yaya is the best Yaya in the whole world. I wanted to drink Tom Yum soup yesterday night.. and she cooked it for me today. And it's super yummy. Spoilt child. I'm going to learn the recipe and cook it for you, you and you.. soon.

Race this weekend. Hope there will be wind and lots of fun.

If you ask me, I want a drum set.

Watched Jack and Rai perform at the Esplanade outdoor theater. I could watch them forever. Love Jack's guitar skills and Rai's voice. We got lucky. We went for a walk and they happened to be performing just as we reached.

I've been a bit sleep deprived. Haven't been sleeping too well. It was weird. Last night I couldn't sleep from around 3.40 to 4.30 ish. I'd rather dream a lot while sleeping, than day(night) dreaming while awake. Better sleep soon.

Well, I had a nice day today. Woke up, had breakfast, lazed around, did some stuff, went sailing, had a good session. After training Sean, Joel, Dawn and I went to subways for a.. well, sandwich. It's nice to sit and eat, chat and laugh. Fun times.

School's starting in about 3 weeks. Get ready.

I've been thinking a lot lately. I do have a tendency to think too much. Ok goodnight.

I need to plan my next escapade. Maybe something to look forward to during mid term break? I like the sound of that. Plan plan plan.

We're on a mission. I've been on that mission for years now. Help me!!! Maybe something with more impact? Mmm....

That's 2 maybes already. I obviously have many questions I can't answer myself.

Tonight brought back some unhappy memories (unfortunately) about some trips in the past. But it also made me thankful for all that is happening at sailing currently and for all that I can look forward to. I hope we all get to go this year end.

Hope the wind will be good tomorrow. I hope there's strong wind and then we'll go on a long upwind and reach all the way down. Using newer spin = easier to go on a reach = more fun.

Watched Transformers and Harry Potter. Both were quite funny and pleasant to watch. I want to watch Public Enemies.

Natalie came over last night (with her parents Jacob and Tracy haha). She's so cute!! 2 people replied Dawn, telling her they'll be coming. 2 others replied saying they can't make it.. In the end, about 13 people came.

Time flies. Was browsing photos and I rediscovered some photos that I really like.
Was that 2 years ago.. or 3?

4 years ago. One of my fav close up photos. Love Dongdong's expression.

Daddy and I doing random stuff.

I need to go browse the desktop computer for more treasure.

Last night, I answered some questions that I haven't been able to answer for 7 years. I need more nights like that. It is always important to savor some moments in life.. just sit and enjoy the good feeling it brings.

I can't say whether it's right or wrong, good or bad. I only know it's what my heart wants.

A few more weeks till school starts. AH!!! I was going to take all my modules alone but somehow, I only managed to get the classes with people I know in it. It's not a bad thing. It just is. Have to go bid again.

"The question of how to enjoy one’s life and be reasonably comfortably well-off is a classic conundrum….sometimes it does seem that one has the choice of enjoying life and being poor on one hand or selling one’s soul to the Devil and getting a bit rich on the other."

I sort of had durian for dinner just now.. my appetite's been down. I need good food to revive my inner glutton. Had a pretty long day today and I just remembered, tomorrow will be a long day too.

To sum up my FourFriends trip to Pulau Aur(we didn't make it to Bawah, not enough time, not enough wind). It was timely, relaxing, and I'm glad I went. And I'm happy to meet all the people I haven't met in a long time. Fawn and Lala are still the same..My fav Dream Team. David is just David. Peiquan appears... more mature. :) It's always nice to catch up.

Honestly, (I've said this before I think.. but I'm gonna say it again.) nothing beats lying down on the deck of the boat, staring at the stars and the bright full moon, Keefe playing the guitar on the lower deck, and not really thinking about anything.. Love that feeling. This trip was something else.

The past few days have been special for no special reason.

I think touch is such a wonderful sense. Without the sense of touch, it'll be so hard to feel, to understand, to connect and to love. What would we do without our sense of touch?

I'm going on an adventure on Monday. We're sailing to Pulau Bawah, a group of Indonesian islands east of Malaysia. I just need to go there, relax and have a good time. According to Shaun, Pulau Bawah is a bit too small to be google-earthed, but here's a pic to show you guys what I'm looking forward to. I couldn't find a photo of better quality. But maybe I'll take some nice photos there and I'll put it up.


Life's been good to me and I'm thankful.

On other news, AYG's been running pretty smoothly thanks to all the wonderful people at NSC. And I must say, the liveblog, which is updated by Dawn, is super exciting. I think everyone who don't get to go out to sea to watch the race should follow the blog.

"Penny and me like to roll our windows down, turn the radio up and put the pedal to the ground. And Penny and me like to gaze at starry skies, close our eyes pretend to fly. It's always Penny and me tonight." Love

Even though I was caught in a jam that stretched from Prince Edward exit to Bedok , which got me stuck on ECP (from Marine Parade to Fort Road only!!!) for 1 hour, and I didn't make it to drum lesson in the end, which meant that I did not have to wake up so damn early and not lack sleep and be so tired the whole day, there were many happy things I got out of today.

I woke up with breakfast on the dining table for me. Love.
I had lunch with Char, ate our fav mee tai mak and drank ice milo.
Had a surprisingly good chat with Mr Tan.
Got a big hug.

I could go on, but batt's running low.

Every line of work has a different set of rules. Sometimes you just have to follow the rules whether you like it or not. The rules are there for a reason whether you think they're right or wrong.

If you become intolerant of others, others will become intolerant of you.

If you enjoy doing something, then focus on the good side of it and be happy you're doing it. If you don't enjoy doing something but have to do it, then just do it, without complaining.

We'll all be happier earthlings.


I'm a happy earthling because my heart has made space for 3 wonderful people. Our dearest Oli, Ryan and Frans.

A few days ago, I was driving early in the morning. I was listening to the radio. You know how sometimes you hear a song and you feel like you're gonna have a good day? I love that feeling. That morning, they played "Hey Jude". I was like... "it's a good day no matter what happens in the next 16 hours." And I sang along with the stereo. (The na na na na part was a bit too long. Lasted from Eunos to Siglap.)

Funny thing is, I don't usually listen to Hey Jude, but it gave me a very special feeling that morning. Best thing is, it turned out to be a good day despite all that was happening those few days. I received the sweetest message from the sweetest girl.

Hey Jude, don't make it bad.
Take a sad song and make it better.
Remember to let her into your heart,
Then you can start to make it better.

Someone once told me that by giving, you will, more often than not, lose something of monetary value. Therefore, it becomes easy for someone like me to over-give because I do not know the value of money. Money is earned to be spent. And I guess some people just prefer to spend the extra on others than on themselves. Because to them, it equates to happiness.

Time is money but money is not time. How bizarre. This is such a one sided relationship.

In this sad world of ours, it has become too easy to hate/dislike and many of us fail to see the good side of things. We spend too much time thinking the worst of others that we fail to see the worst of ourselves. Think the good that others have done and stop twisting the good to look bad just because you want to. Because you don't want to regret.

Life and death. The state of being alive and the state of being dead. I just realised that there's only a very fine line between the two. You'll never know who's gonna hop over to the other side or when it's gonna happen. It just happens.

I still haven't answered my first question. Can someone help me out.

Mmm.. We were(and still are) in the internet room and we bumped into a Singaporean backpacker. And then an Israeli backpacker comes in and tells us this stories of Osaka and Nara. We were planning to go to Nara but didn't have time when we were in Kyoto. And Minghui, the Singaporean guy we bumped into also wants to go to Nara after hearing the Israeli guy talking about it. So we might be taking a trip to Nara together.

Meeting people like this Israeli guy (who spent 2 months in Nepal and Tibet, and squeezed in a Japan trip) makes me think that Singaporeans like me have no life. I should go to Mongolia next to visit my friend, Galkhuu.

Today we went to the fox shrine. More like the dog shrine. After walking up that mountain and down, I was sweating and panting like a dog. They filmed one scene of "Memoirs of a Geisha" there.

Need to sleep. Touring Osaka tomorrow.

I love English signboards and notices in Japan.
It's so cute. Imagine trying to pee and having to stare straight at this thing. I tried not to look at this poster and concentrate on pee-ing and I saw this.
I can imagine the kind innkeeper trying so hard to make it sound right. They are so nice. But I pissed myself laughing in the toilet. It's like.... "Put in filth here... PPLLEEASSSEE.."

Walking drains you. We walked for around 6 hours. Visited many temples and shrines.

One of the interesting things we saw.
If you have any troubles, write it on that piece of paper in the shape of a little man.

Then put it into the bucket of water and the paper will dissolve, and so will your troubles. Then we realized that, the trouble was.. we couldn't think of any troubles. (Which is a good thing thank god.)

I miss you .

I'm in a nice little bag packers inn here in Kyoto. It's so nice and clean and homely. Tomorrow we're going to walk the whole stretch of Philosopher's Road, so that I'll finally become smart.

I remember Sam and I went to eat some Scholar's Bak Kut Teh before we got back our A Levels results. He came back with 3As. He stole my As. But anyway, back to my adventure here.

We arrived in HongKong yesterday. My Fat Uncle assumed that I knew HK inside out and asked me to meet him at IFC building in Hong Kong. I'm like "Huh?? ISC? I can't hear you.." And he was like "Ya.. ya... (hai gum la)bye bye." Anyhow, we did end up in IFC which was just above HongKong station. The first thing he told Dawn and I was that he ordered a huge lobster from his friend for dinner. (OOPS, Dawn can't eat seafood..) So he called his buddies to join us for dinner so that we could finish the lobster.

He brought us to WanChai's most famous pineapple bun, chicken pie and egg tart place for tea. Dawn loved the chicken pie. Then we went to his friend's fresh seafood store to collect. Then home. Then he made me go bathe immediately (at 5pm!!! those who know me should know that's just ridiculous). He went downstairs to buy slippers for us because he said my feet were dirty. He's so funny I tell you. He calls his cigarettes "char siew bao". So when I nag at him to not smoke he says he's not smoking, he's eating.

I was like lying down going to sleep then he said "if you not sleepy, don't have to sleep one.. I'm not like your grandfather, whole day ask people to sleep early. My place is a free society. You're free to do what you want." (In cantonese of course.) Which reminds me, he couldn't really communicate with Dawn. It was so funny. He said he knew English "HALO, how are you my friend.... Prada, Gucci, LV.."

This morning Dawn and I had to go downstairs to take the bus A10 to the airport. We were going into the lift and he came out of his flat in his super unglam clothes and said "don't trust your sense of direction.. wait, you don't even have any sense of direction. sure get lost one." He walked us down to the bus stop, which was seriously just downstairs outside the lifts. I totally would not have gotten lost. This is love. And this is also why I'm not gonna tell him that his cigarette smoke was freaking suffocating me to death when I was trying to sleep, and that I'm probably gonna live a few months less because of that.

You know those days where you don't have time to even breathe? You're running from place to place trying to get things done. I just had one of those days.

Ironically, I had plenty of time to breathe. I had a breathing lesson today. I rushed to breathing lesson and rushed off from breathing lesson. Haha. I almost fell asleep when I was told to "concentrate on (my) breathing and just relax" while lying down on the floor.

Soul searching is a very important part of our lives. We all need a bit of that once in a while. By being honest with yourself, you learn a lot and grow and mature.

I must say today was a rather productive day. Finished all that I set out to do. I have always believed that there's no such thing as "I had no time to eat". But today, I proved myself wrong. Man. Love Uncle Edwin for the peanut butter sandwich. This reminds me, I didn't drink much water today either.

A promise is a promise. I made sure I finished all the work I was meant to finish tonight. I'm glad I did. (Earn some spending moolah too.) Everything had to happen today. But anyway I'm so mentally tired to do anything about.. it. I'm leaving in the morning and I haven't finished packing.

Thank you Nana, for coming all the way to my house to pass me the bag. That's love.

I just realized that, if you give a shit about something, you probably care. You know what's a really sad line from a song? "If only I had said what I still hide" from Turn Back Time by Aqua.

exercise road rage in front of my driving instructor. woohoo!! score points baby..


This is a photo of the biggest studio in My Drum School. (That's really what my drum school is called.. I'm not trying to be funny.)

The photo makes it look a lot bigger than it really is. This studio is for group classes, although I get to use it sometimes too. There are 2 more studios, one for adult ind lessons, one for kids!! The kiddy drumset is damn cute.

Extreme right studio is kids room, 2nd from right is the adult ind studio.

It's hard to believe it's a one-man show in there huh. Respect for James.

The word "sorry" has a liberating effect because of the very fact that not everyone can say it.
I didn't come looking for me.
The tennis commentator just said, "Her father.. a little gold chain, fine moustache..... but that was a fine forehand.."

When you think you're not going to enjoy doing something, pull out before you commit to it. And I just discovered one thing that many people fail to realize: When you assume someone's going to do something, and that person doesn't do it, he didn't do anything wrong. And you might have been wrong to assume in the first place. This is going to help my sailing.

Federer made it to the finals baby!! They say watching him play live is like a near religious experience. I NEED to watch him play live one day.

Woke up to the show "Roger Federer: The Spirit of a Champion". What a perfect way to start my day. Need to go training.

When I eat an apple, I need to enjoy it. My mind was preoccupied with something else when I was eating my apple just now and before I knew it, I've finished eating it. URGH. I totally didn't taste it.

I've never enjoyed watching the National Rugby League this much. Ha. Crazy men running into other crazy men. I love it when they actually get to run. They're sick.

A week more of hard work and I'm going on ho-li-day. Yay. I've been pretty dehydrated. I need to drink more water.... The weather's been so terrible. 34degrees plus this humidity = I'm so sian. I don't mind a change.


Sometimes you learn some things you don't want to know. Sometimes you know some things but pretend you don't, because you don't want to know. Sometimes you don't know if you want to know. I conclude it's best I don't know.

Go Federer!!!! French Open quarter finals..... I have to put this picture up.

I need to get some Sugar Ray into my eardrums. 

This is getting very exciting. I think I'm more or less packed until... mid July. Mission accomplished. So from then till school starts, I relax, bid for classes and get ready to start school. (urgh. :P) This all means that I HAVE to finish the editing by next week and I'm all set. 

Life is funny. My house is funny. So, Dawn's brother aka Stine, couldn't make his birthday dinner with his family last night but ended up in my house with Denise because Sara baked him a mango birthday cake and the cake was left in my refrigerator. It has also become a meeting place for friends whose purpose of coming here is not really to see me. Call it a pit stop, shelter.. home... :) 

I really don't mind.

I'm dreading gym next week. 25 single leg squats x6. The last time I got thigh cramp, I did 18x6. So, I wonder what's going to happen. 

I am a citizen with a passport and it's a very cool fact. I'm ready to take my little red book and conquer the world. Now, all I need is a bottle of this.

The funniest video I've seen on YouTube. Our very own Elizabeth Yin!!! Check it out. "The sharks got him... the sharks got him...."

手牵手一步两步三步四步望着天
看星星一颗两颗三颗四颗连成线
oh i miss that song.

I hate injections. I was never afraid of them until recently.. like a few years ago. I don't know why. I used to always volunteer to go first but now........ UURRGGGHHHH.... It hurts. Feels so bruised.

Anyway, the weather's a bit cooler today! At least this morning was. So let's hope it'll be a good day and everything will go smoothly. And if it does, I'll announce the big news tonight. *twiddle my thumbs* (oh wait, maybe tmr.)

No I'm not getting married. Yet.

Meeting place: 2cm to the right of the tile right outside the window between the kitchen and the living room
Time: 7.01pm
Person to meet: Sister who is too free

That's not my only lame sister. Nana msn-ed me the other day, telling me about her plan to surprise me in June when she comes home by not telling me she's coming home.

肥舅父：端午節我會莊香給公公婆婆保佑妳們身體健康。
Me: 我舅父is the best.

Tonight we visited Jolie and Hanhan.. Jolie plays with me now!!! And she's so cute! She kept hiding in the same place and I had to "find" her. Reminded me of the time I played "hide and seek" with Tara when I brought her to Bobbin Head National Park.

Another long day ahead.

The weather's been so hot. Urgh. We were blessed with fantastic weather for the first 4 months this year. And now......
You search for peace and happiness, but
Just a thought. Is life meant to be understood?
sometimes you say things you didn't mean to say,
The next 2 months were meant to be exciting. I wonder how it'll turn out. A super busy and messy week ahead. You know the kind where one thing depends on another and you can't really make solid plans, but have to finish this list of tasks? Yeah..
and sometimes you hear things you're not meant to hear.
I'm tired. Sleepy.

I can only use animals to describe how I'm feeling.

I've got to be half turtle half sheep.

Caught off guard.
Laugh.
Walk away and pretend you didn't hear it.

See a rainbow.
Smile.
It has obviously made your day.

Truth versus partial truth.
Your call.
Both are truths.

The look in your eyes.
Love.
Content the way things are.


Another day in paradise.
I wanna go surfing.. I wanna go. I wanna go. Snowboarding works too. Anywhere. Please.

it's sad that i find it easy to be mean to people i love

Life jokes with you sometimes. Sometimes you sacrifice one thing for something else that you thought was worth the sacrifice, and it comes back to haunt you. It happens. Mostly to selfless people I think.

But do not regret the choices you've made it life. Everything happens for a reason and I believe the reason will surface sooner or later. (This is one of the rules I live by, by the way. It is very helpful.)

Do you remember how happy or sad you, you or you felt when you guys received your PSLE grades? Do you remember how disappointed/elated you were with your O Level or A Level grades? Does it all matter now? No.(Ok, maybe to some people it does..) But my point is... every stage in your life will become the past that no one really cares about. So as long as you try your best in what you're doing and you're happy doing what you're doing, it's good enough.

Sometimes you work harder than others but the others win the race. But there are thousands of races in this life and you just got to keep trying. So what if you lose this one.

Sad truth is, the best don't always win and the good don't always triumph over evil... in the short run............... But keep trying and keep believing. Because I believe in you.

One thing i've just discovered. Emo-ness can go away when you see someone else emo-ing worse than you. Hahaha...


Teaching a hyperactive 5-yr-old boy is tiring. Confirmed.

That's him trying to hide between the sofa seats.

I need plans. No drum lessons this 2 weeks because James is at reservist. This probably means going to work more. Earn more moolah.

The weather looks so nice now, ideal for a swim. But my sore legs really make me not want to go waddle in the pool. Ironically, I feel like going for a run. Bun.

Gym was sick yesterday. My left thigh cramped up after the single leg squats. I thought calf cramps were painful. That explains why my legs are sore. I am not looking forward to 25x6 single leg squats. I need more salt in my body.

I went to Taka a few days back hoping to spend my vouchers, get something nice for myself. But, as usual, I ended up getting stuff for the kids. A Dora towel for Tara because she loves Dora, a Winnie the Pooh towel for Alysha because she loves Winnie the Pooh, and a Funshine Carebear backpack for Lil because she looks like Funshine.

I helped mummy teach Max yesterday. He's so cute. He was telling me about how he stole 2 peanuts from the peanut box in the kitchen and that the peanuts were salty. (Mission Impossible for a 5-year-old) And he pronounces 7(qi) as ti. Teaching him tomorrow again I think. love.

Yaya made my day first thing in the morning when I woke up. "I didn't see you yesterday. I waited until 11.30pm because I miss you but you still haven't come home....." Aww..... Love in my house.

I'd like to say sorry to President Hu Jin Tao, because when I was uploading stuff onto the online portal at work today, I accidentally put him under the category "Boats". Sorry, Mr President of the People's Republic of China.


Designed by Mihara Yasohiro.


And this is what I call a tantrum. Cross arms uncomfortably and pout! :)